the would-be writers guild » Family http://wouldbewritersguild.com/blog mediocre writing at its best Thu, 14 May 2009 16:43:51 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 en hourly 1 In a sentimental mood http://wouldbewritersguild.com/blog/2006/04/07/in-a-sentimental-mood/ http://wouldbewritersguild.com/blog/2006/04/07/in-a-sentimental-mood/#comments Fri, 07 Apr 2006 20:58:42 +0000 Tiffany http://wouldbewritersguild.com/blog/?p=110 Do you ever have those days?  When the thought of your husband busily getting the kids fed, dressed, combed and off to the babysitter while you’re at work is enough to make your eyes well up with tears?  Or the image of your fuzzy-headed seven year-old begging to stay up and watch the 10 o’clock news gives you a friendly lump in your throat?  Or your slow speaking two-year’s rendition of “To infinity and beyond!”  makes your heart pitter-patter?  When the thought of your mom, swinging on a swingset with your little ones, being the grandma every kid should have, makes the sun shine brighter?  Or the idea of your family gathering tonight on the couch in front of a good movie practically makes your toes tingle?

I love those days.

]]> http://wouldbewritersguild.com/blog/2006/04/07/in-a-sentimental-mood/feed/ 0 If you bring me a chocolate shake when I’m bummed, you totally get a shout-out on the website http://wouldbewritersguild.com/blog/2006/03/07/if-you-bring-me-a-chocolate-shake-when-im-bummed-you-totally-get-a-shout-out-on-the-website/ http://wouldbewritersguild.com/blog/2006/03/07/if-you-bring-me-a-chocolate-shake-when-im-bummed-you-totally-get-a-shout-out-on-the-website/#comments Tue, 07 Mar 2006 14:58:44 +0000 Tiffany http://wouldbewritersguild.com/blog/?p=40 One of the good things about having a monumentally bad day is that you get to receive love from your loved ones’ love reservoir.  It’s not your every day, hey-how’s-it-going love, it’s the love that says, “Even though other people think you’re worthless, I still think you’re as great as sliced bread, disposable diapers, and cell phones.  Maybe even better.”

Friday at work was bad.  Friday night, after Ryan and Christian left for the Jazz game with our neighbors (and after Ryan had promised to mangle any coworkers who might cross his path), I found myself in the quiet house with Max who was jovial and loving and a good dose of bad-day medicine.  Then, my parents showed up on my doorstep with a chocolate Butterfinger shake, and a 14 hour miniseries to watch together.  We ate our shakes.  We ranted together.  We watched one of the best shows I’ve ever seen (BBC’s Bleak House).  Well, at least two hours of it.  It was a great escape from all the hard work I was putting into creating an ulcer in my stomach.

I like love reservoirs.  I like that they contain chocolate shakes, great movies, big hugs, and validation for your 3 hour rants.  They are the silver lining of bad days and last a whole lot longer.

]]> http://wouldbewritersguild.com/blog/2006/03/07/if-you-bring-me-a-chocolate-shake-when-im-bummed-you-totally-get-a-shout-out-on-the-website/feed/ 0 Floating Air Biscuits and Singing at the Table http://wouldbewritersguild.com/blog/2006/03/01/floating-air-biscuits-and-singing-at-the-table/ http://wouldbewritersguild.com/blog/2006/03/01/floating-air-biscuits-and-singing-at-the-table/#comments Wed, 01 Mar 2006 15:31:49 +0000 Tiffany http://wouldbewritersguild.com/blog/?p=23 I wasn’t allowed to say “fart” as a child.  We “tooted”, “poofed”, “let one”, “passed gas”, or “sent a floating air biscuit”, but at our house, we did not fart.  I’ll have to ask my mom sometime where the roots of this family rule began.  Fart seems like a perfectly harmless word to me, and a fairly good descriptor.  Maybe fart meant something worse in previous generations.  Maybe only bad people farted. 

Apparently we also had a problem at our house with people singing during dinner, which brought about the rule, “No singing at the table.”  I wonder, did the problem escalate to the point of chaos?  Showtunes and pop songs kept interrupting requests for the salt to be passed?  Did my parents meet behind closed doors, discussing what to do about all the dinner-time showstoppers?  What could they do?  They had to come down hard and fast and nip this problem in the bud.

We weren’t allowed to watch “The Simpsons” because it threatened the very essence of what is good and praiseworthy.  I didn’t watch “The Simpsons” until I was paying for the roof over my head, which is only fair.  I don’t watch it a lot, but the episode in which Homer works from home and wears a moo-moo will always have a special place in my heart.

There was another rule that I thought was silly, until about two years ago.  The rule: No clean clothes in the dirty clothes.  As a child, this seemed like a great way to quickly clean a dirty room.  What was the big deal?  I’m here to formally apologize.  Mom, I TOTALLY get it now, and I’m REALLY sorry. 

Now that I am the parent, I have to say that my set of rules are completely reasonable and purpose-driven.  For example, my kids are not allowed to say “bootylicious”.  You may say “gorgeous”, “beautiful”, or ”hubba-hubba”, but I don’t want to hear smut like “bootylicious” coming out of their innocent little mouths.

Next rule: No playing with mom’s fingernails.  They are mine.  If you need something scratched or you need something to fidget with during a movie, GROW YOUR OWN.

Final rule: My kids will not be allowed to watch “The Bachelor”.  Ever.  Punishable by death.

So you see, while my parents had some strange and sometimes arbitrary rules, I only have reasonable, non-absurd rules, created for the betterment of my family and society as a whole. 

So, what are/were the rules at your house, dear reader?

]]> http://wouldbewritersguild.com/blog/2006/03/01/floating-air-biscuits-and-singing-at-the-table/feed/ 3 If you invite me over for dinner, you totally get a shout-out on the website http://wouldbewritersguild.com/blog/2006/02/27/if-you-invite-me-over-for-dinner-you-totally-get-a-shout-out-on-the-website/ http://wouldbewritersguild.com/blog/2006/02/27/if-you-invite-me-over-for-dinner-you-totally-get-a-shout-out-on-the-website/#comments Mon, 27 Feb 2006 17:54:47 +0000 Tiffany http://wouldbewritersguild.com/blog/?p=20 Ryan’s sister, Alison, invited us over for dinner yesterday because she is nice and knows that we don’t care that she only has eight mis-matched forks, even though she’s been married for over 20 years. Luckily, I was able to snag one of the forks to eat my food, although I feel kind of bad about Alison’s husband, Bryant, having to eat with a spatula.

The food was really good, especially the bread braid the sesame cream cheese dip with pears and crackers, which I plan to attempt for the next WBWG meeting.  (Trust me, writers, it’s going to blow your mind.) I made a lumpy Jell-O salad, which I can blame almost entirely on the fact that I had to leave it right after I stirred in the hot water to remove a screaming Max from the bathtub, then I dressed him, then turned on a movie for him, then walked downstairs and checked the laundry, then had a tortilla chip, then turned on some music, then yelled for Christian to get dressed and stop playing his video games naked, then wiped down the kitchen counter, then saw the Jell-O sitting there, then said a bad word.  I don’t deserve to be called a Utahn.  (For the Jell-O or the bad word.)

After dinner, Alison retrieved their wiry-head-scratcher-thingie, which I give an enthusiastic two thumbs up!  It did nothing for Ryan or Bryant, which just goes to show that they have absolutely no taste in wiry-head-scratcher-thingies, because if that didn’t feel good to you, then NOTHING WILL.  Max especially liked it and tried it on his head, his face, and probably their toilet.

We stuck around long enough for Alison to whip up a batch of peanut butter bars with chocolate frosting.  I really admire the fact that she has all the ingredients on-hand and twenty minutes later has a pan full of peanut-butter happiness.  I probably have the ingredients on hand, but I just let them sit in the cupboard  and hope that they will magically mix themselves together and put themselves in the oven.  I have so much to learn.  Eventually we left because Alison stopped feeding us, and we loaded in the car and drove away with them waving to us in their doorway.  Having family around is something we really appreciate right now, with the prospect of moving away looming closer and closer with Ryan’s graduation.  Who else is going to invite you over for dinner on Sunday night?  Who else is going to make you peanut butter bars?  Who else is going to have a head-scratcher-thingie that fits perfectly into your purse when nobody is looking?

 

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