I’ve come up with some ideas to help with your presentation today:
- Open with a pirate joke.
- When somebody asks a question you don’t understand, simply laugh and say, “I’m not even going to entertain you with a response to that. Let me know when you come up with a real question.”
- When explaining a conclusion, point upwards and say, “and I got that from the Man Upstairs.” (Then wink.)
- Somewhere in the middle stop for a rest hymn.
- Every time you use the term diabetes, do that quotation thing with your fingers.
- If that one girl starts grilling you, put your fingers in your ears and say, “La la la la, I hate you, la la la la la.”
- When giving an example, introduce it by saying, “Let me see if I can dumb this down for you….”
- Try to make the end rhyme. People love that.
- Don’t forget to bow when it’s over.
Good luck, honey!
I have another suggestion – he can remove his glasses and rub the bridge of his nose and forehead and sigh to emphasize how exasperating it is to answer questions so beneath him.
He should start off with that techno music that gets everyone going at the Jazz games. You know the one that says “Ya’ll ready for this?”
Ryan, I hope things went really well.
Is the Pope catholic?
Is the sky blue?
Does it rain in Spain?
Is the gospel true?
Was anyone worried?
(Except maybe Ryan)
You make us all proud, Ryan. Still counting on free analysis and counseling when we go over the edge. I’m not sure when you will know it’s happened for me, but if you see your father-in-law sitting in the meridian of I-15, shooting out any headlights on hi beam, plus any of those blue laser lights, he’s already warned me, that’s his sign.