A few notes I think I’ll send out today….

March 18th, 2006

Dear President of Questar Gas,

So, I guess $287.54 only gets you the monthly cold-but-not-frozen-to-death heating package?

Sincerely,

Tiffany


Dear Jessica Simpson, 

I have not seen a Jessica Simpson line of feminine hygiene products.  (Just wanted to let you know an area of the retail market you can still capture.)

Your friend,

Tiffany


Dear Bird Flu, 

Don’t even think about it.  Seriously.

Respectfully,

Tiffany (US Citizen)


Dear Target, 

You’re the best.  Thanks for all the good times.

Lovingly yours,

Tiffany


Dear Diarrhea, 

It’s really time for you to leave.  I’ve been more than patient.  Leave now or face my wrath.  And more Pepto.

Tiffany


Dear Spring, 

This is what I was afraid of, you wussy.

Tiffany


Dear Dick Nourse, 

Time to tone it down, big boy, or we’ll have to call for a wardrobe intervention.  Oh, and lay off the Krispy Kremes.  At this rate, I fear you may gobble Nadine during a commercial break.

Because friends always tell the truth,

Tiffany


Dear Taco Bell, 

I have to admit, I was skeptical about the CrunchWrap Supreme, but you’ve really got something there.

Gracias,

Tiffany

 

One Response to “A few notes I think I’ll send out today….”

  1. John says:

    In regards to note #5:

    The key is taking the right medication. Immodium AD in tablet or liquid form. You’ll never ever go back to that disgusting pink stuff again.

    Just my tip. (Probably a little too late for this bout. Sorry.)

    John

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